Creating a relaxation room sounds nice but that is not ideal in my household. Actually to be honest the only relaxation room I get in my house now is the bathroom when I’m in the shower. This is only because I have a gate at my bedroom door to keep the dogs out of the room and we have our own bathroom. This was hardly the case a few years ago when I would be in the bathroom and still see little hands wiggling underneath the door and a voice saying, “Mom what are you doing?” See life seems to keep us preoccupied with the stresses of reality.
Stress is the most debilitating issue of concern today and through my research of blogs, articles and other written documentary I have found its the most written about also. I can’t say I’m the least surprised by this finding and I don’t think you will be either but there are ways to help limit or manage stress. Stress affects both men, women and children and I don’t want to belittle this fact. It has been shown to have extreme negative effects and the proof is in the pudding with all the arising illnesses but I wanted to state an interesting fact I found recently. It is proven that women are more stressed out than men. Moms spend 14 more hours per week on childcare and housework than fathers do according to a recent PEW Research Center report.
How others distress their lives
1) Meditate/learning to self relax/create a relaxation room/aromatherapy
2) Eat healthy/drink green tea/exercise
3) Correct your posture/visualization/sleep
How I manage/limit my stress
Some of these steps I will limit explanation and then some steps I will go more in-depth through follow-up blogs if you want to take a look at them.
First of all, limiting or managing stress doesn’t happen overnight (this is a very hard concept to understand since we are a society that wants EVERYTHING NOW). It takes consistency, taking baby steps over and over. How does a baby learn to walk? They take a couple of steps, fall, get back up again and repeat until they are walking fast and then running.
Secondly, we have to retrain our thought process. This may be a very blunt statement for some people. We have years of negativity to undue in our society thus in our minds and this takes consistency to reinforce positive thinking. I will do a follow-up blog with this concept so make sure you check it out. I have had lots of years to retrain my thinking but it’s been such a huge blessing for my overall well-being.
1) As a mother the only time I get time alone is when my daughter takes her nap and my boys are in school. Other than that it’s hard to get even 10 minutes alone but I do two-minute breaks throughout the day. I will sit on my bed away from the stressful situation for two minutes, close my eyes, and take deep breaths. Sometimes I will think of something that makes me happy, imagine it or put in my headphones with some uplifting, Christian music. This sounds ridiculous but I use this method to self relax and it puts a barrier between me and what’s stressing me out.
2) Listen to music – my music has to be uplifting and I have recently done research on how music affects your body, mood, tension level, and psychologically. Although I firmly believe words in the song have a negative or positive effect on you I did research to find out if there was more. Music rhythms and the vibrations within the song, uplifting or not, effect you all around either negatively or positively. I personally have a wireless headset so I can clean my house while listening, doing other household chores, laying down in my bed for a few just to clear my head or working.
Don’t exclude playing uplifting music throughout your house. My kids love dancing around with me and it lets us relax or I even play music when I am in the shower. I include my kids on having fun.
3) I read my bible and pray. If this is not up your alley then read a book. I use to read books to my kids every night and it was a soothing effect as long as it was a book promoting positivity. I can’t seem to find time to read a book now except for if I’m reading it with my children so I involve them. I choose to wake up and read my bible before the start of the day.
4) Writing things down help me because then I can clear all my thoughts from my head on paper. It can be a few words or more. This is also a good way to write down 2-4 things a day that you’re grateful for to start the positive thinking. If you have children then have them sit with you and write it or just say it out loud.
5) A huge way for me to relieve stress is to show appreciation. When I am having a stressful situation with my husband, kids or even a boss at work I will go up to them and tell them one thing I appreciate about them. There’s a significant effect appreciation has even in bad situations on both you and the person you’re having a problem with. It changes your way of thinking which puts you in a good mood and then most likely changes their attitude. If it doesn’t that’s their problem.
Also on this note, since I’m a parent I love using these as examples but this can be used in other situations. Say one of my kids is having a meltdown when you’re already stressed about the day and everything you have to get done. Just grab them, hug them and breathe before you give a consequence or a response because there’s a miracle in a hug and profound results. That’s why research says hugging and kissing your significant other can provide more happiness than not. It takes great restraint to even walk away.
5) My family and I are starting to correct our eating habits and exercising which we have noticed a difference in how we are feeling. Now the big, bad word EXERCISING. We are not talking about losing weight here but about managing stress. If you have children get outside and play with them. This will kill two birds with one stone – family time and exercising to relax. The outdoors do wonders to someone’s mood and good quality family time helps everyone in the family feel happier and fulfilled.
4) Smiling and laughing does wonders for your posture and mood. Now how do we find time to laugh and smile in stressful situations when all we want to do is pull our hair out. Well, just try it one time. When you are irritated force that smile because it’s proven that people who frown and slouch possess feelings of despair and ‘feeling down’ more than someone laughing and smiling.
5) Aromatherapy or essential oils is an awesome, useful way to help with stress among other ailments that we face through illnesses, etc. I will have a follow-up blog on essential oils so make sure you check it out.